Family

Hello everyone,

First, I’m sorry for the delay in my blog.  I have decided to switch the day I write my blog from Monday to Tuesday.  It is too difficult to figure out a time to write it on Mondays because I work so early in the morning on those days.

I think it is an interesting shift when a friend becomes family.  I often say that close friends are the family that you get to choose.  Whether it is your close buddies, your “girl friends” or your spouse, they are the people who entered your life at a time that you needed them and have left their eternal mark on your soul.  I truly believe that often the Lord sends us to each other to be His hands in helping others.  I know that there have been countless times when someone has said, “Hey, just thinking about you,” and it has made all the difference to me on that day.  The difference between friends and family is that family has to love you no matter what.  They can go months and years being bitter, angry, and not talking, but still love you.  It’s amazing how sometimes we can take these valuable relationships for granted because we know that no matter how hard things get, eventually our family will come back.  On the reverse side, friends have the option to walk away.  They can stop loving you if they no longer like you.  This is heartbreaking because it is our friends who are so often our confidants and who we feel closest to.  There are some wonderful exceptions, but in general when people enter their teenage years, there is a very deliberate shift from the family to a focus on friends and independence.  We need these formative years to develop and learn to govern ourselves, but they pull us away from our families.  As we continue to get older many people relearn to value their families and learn to juggle friends as family, and family as friends.

I have the wonderful blessing of being adopted.  When I was much younger I did not see it as a blessing, just as a part of my life.  I had a difficult childhood, but I am so happy for it because it has brought me to where I am.  I was adopted when I was 10, and so as much as my parents didn’t fully understand what they were getting themselves into they had an idea, and they chose me.  It took a few years, but eventually I chose them too.  I call my adoption a blessing because in all reality my family and my friends were all hand chosen by me to be a part of my life, and I was chosen by each and every one of them to be in their lives as well.  Not many people have this privilege and I feel so greatly blessed by the Lord to be able to say that my family includes my birth family, my adopted family, my extended family, four additional brothers, and one additional sister.  That is a great family filled with nearly a hundred people who have selected each other to spend their eternities together.  What a beautiful thought.

"Sometimes in life, you find a special friend. Someone who changes your life by being a part of it. Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop. Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world. Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it. This is forever friendship. When you're down, and the world seems dark and empty, your forever friend lifts you up in spirit and makes that dark and empty world suddenly bright and full. Your forever friend gets you through the hard times, the sad times, the confused times. If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows. If you lose your way, your forever friend guides you and cheers you on. Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay. And if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete, because you need not worry; you have a forever friend, and forever has no end."

I know that this is in relation to a spouse, and someday when I am ready to be married I will look for all of these qualities in my future bride, but for my purposes now it is about family members.  As I continue to get older I know that I will lose some of my friends, but I will absolutely collect more family.  This life may be a difficult one, but it is also a blessed and happy existence if we choose it to be.

Love,

Drew